Last, lazy Sunday

ESL
Classes start again tomorrow after a long break. We have about two weeks of classes until our two-week period of standardized testing called the CATS tests begins. We're going to use a program called "Read and Write Gold" as text-reader software for the kids for the test. I'm not sure what to expect, but I know that last year I had to do a lot of reading for several students, and I wasn't able to do as much reading as would have been helpful because I was so stretched. This might be better for them. We're practicing with it right now.

I have to admit that CATS testing is truly a time of discouragement for me and for my students. They are routinely asked to do tasks that they can't do because NCLB requires them to--reminding them that they are children who are behind. I totally agree with the need for accountability. However, I argue that we need appropriate accountability for ESL students. The very students whom NCLB is meant to support are not able to show their abilities because of the inappropriateness of the testing.

Running
I'm headed out for a quick four miler after I finish writing this post. I'm embarrassed at how small my running base is, and I have plenty of excuses to offer up for it, but the best way to remedy it is to just run. Sometimes, though, life just gets in the way of what you have planned.
The New Balance commercials on television right now really speak to me. I need to find a link to those somewhere online.

Annie
Miss Annie is trying out her crate for the first time since the operation, and there has been a bit of pouting about it, but she seems to be doing pretty well. This surprises me a little bit as she has historically broken out of every crate I've ever put her in to. It may have something to do with the fact that I'm still in the same room as she is in. She's pouting. And I'm sad about it. Two weeks since the accident, and she has four weeks of recovery left. Last night at about 3:30 a.m., I woke up to the saddest sound--Annie had rolled over on her bad leg and gotten it tangled up underneath her. She couldn't get it out. It was kind of like an overstretched rubberband. So she was panicking. And Guinness was on the floor trying to help (useless). And I was SOooooo sleepy. Four more weeks. Did I mention that one of her teats is swollen and the vet thinks she may need surgery? (The picture above is of Annie in the bathtub at my old house. She loved to sit in the bathtub).

A few hours later...running and houses

We've got a tenant in our house for two months. This is an incredible comfort to me. More comforting would be if the people who looked at the house this morning were to buy it, but that's maybe still in the works. Seems lots of people like the house, but few are qualified to own it. The folks who looked at it this morning are in some sort of a credit-recovery program that will allow them to buy a house, and they seemed to express a need to get a house soon. They apparently pulled up in a Mercedes to look at the house. Kevin said that's probably why they are in a credit-recovery program--car rich and house poor. What do we know? If they are interested in the house, and they can get the loan for it, we're totally willing to sell it to them!

10 miler update

As we were sitting having lunch today, Kevin and I came to the agreement that we won't be driving up to Louisville to run the 10 miler tomorrow. There are any number of reasons that we could list. The biggest is that we aren't feeling mentally or physically ready. I know I'm not. I know I could finish a ten miler. After enjoying the sufferfest that is an Ironman marathon--twice--I am confident that I can make any distance if I am willing to slow down enough and suffer enough. The question becomes what I'm looking to get out of the experience. And honestly, weighing all the other pieces of the equation, it just didn't make sense for us to go run that run. 

Reading

I was given a copy of The Freedom Writer's Diaries (or something along those lines for a title) at Christmas, and I just picked it up and started reading it. It's nice to see what a teacher is doing in her classroom that is so inspiring for her students. There's a bit of jealousy in me that I really do thoughtfully seek out opportunities to inspire my students, and I seem to get discouraged and miss the mark more often than I'd like to. But I guess I can just keep working at it. I grow so frustrated b y the state standards that require so much of my kids and take away some of the autonomy that makes a good teacher a good teacher. I seek balance. 

Teaching reading...New socks...a new adventure...

Annie has been the focus of this blog for the last week, but I've quickly realized that I have a lot on my plate. And I'm not sure if I'm going to have a multi-directional blog here.

ESL Newcomer's Center
I spent part of my trip to Michigan pulling together some materials for the ESL Newcomer's Center. In particular, I found a text by Mary Cappellini called Balancing Reading and Language Learning that is about working with developing readers while they are also developing reading skills. This is a challenge for me. In my MATESL studies, we spent quite some time looking at teaching reading in English, but I don't recall any focus on teaching reading to people who can't already read, and many of my middle schoolers are below grade level in their reading. Some are illiterate. So I'm looking forward to digging into this text. DH had to actually remind me that I am on vacation as I was reading and underlining in the text as soon as I got it home.

I'm now searching for some resources on Learning Centers. I'm excited to spend some time this summer pulling together my new classroom. Did I mention it has three windows? And two doors to the outside world?

Running
10 miler on Saturday. So I'm headed out for an easy six today. I have to admit that there is a certain amount of shame and guilt when I fall off the running wagon. I love running. I love triathlon. I love cycling. I love swimming. But now and again, I can't get myself going to do any of them and then I feel guilty. And now I'm signed up for some races, and I'm feeling unprepared. And even signing up for races doesn't make me feel motivated.

Ironman training took a lot out of me last summer and fall, and it's been really hard for me to get back into a rhythm. Quite frankly, I don't mind going to races underprepared. I just kind of run my own run and get done and quietly head on my way home. But I've signed up for running a half marathon with my best friend in a week. And I'm embarrassed at my lack of preparation in the way that you get embarrassed when someone comes over and your house isn't as clean as you'd like it to be. I've got to deal with the guilt.

The crafty knitty side of me
I'm posting a pic of my latest project--my first pair of socks. It's a pattern from Blackberry Ridge. This is some of their gorgeous hand-dyed yarn, and I bought it on a trip to Wisconsin with my mom several years back, but I'm finally getting around to knitting them. If all goes well, I'll be making socks for everyone in DH's family for Christmas. Last year, we really tried to do as many homemade gifts as possible, and I think we're going to try that again this year. The dog in the picture of this one, incidentally, is our other black lab mutt--Guinness. She's nutty in her own special way. But she's the perfect backdrop for the start of the socks.

10 miles...am I a moron?

So Saturday we are running a race in Louisville. 10 miles. I've not come close to running that distance since Ironman (last September), and my longest run has been just over 6 uncomfortable miles. Anyone with half a brain working in their head would decide not to run this race, but I'm going to be run/walking it, and I'm looking at it as my atonement for months of slothfulness. There's a part of me that likes to punish myself when I don't do what I think I should be doing.

Just got back from a trip to Michigan with Annie in tow. She had a rough time in the car--too much to look at and no self-control. She ate well; she wouldn't eat dog food, so I gave her people food that she doesn't normally get to eat. A cheeseburger. A hamburger. Gravy. An egg. Spoiled. I adore this dog...too much, really.

And there aren't any deep thoughts for this post. A trip home always makes me a little introspective and a little wistful. And I guess the very nature of introspectiveness means that I'm not going to post it for the world to see until I've done a little processing. 

Annie in her natural environment...

I'm trying to figure out how to upload a picture of my girl. She's not really cooperating. She's laying on the couch on her back, spread out as long as she can get. And, of course, she's laying on the side the doctor doesn't want her to be laying on--the side of her surgery. The computer isn't really cooperating, either. I'm still playing around with the camera on my laptop, so I'm a work in progress.

It was a rough night last night. I slept on the couch. She slept on the floor. And I think she only moved three times, but I woke up absolutely every time she even thought about moving. We've been outside once. It's raining. She couldn't make the one step it took to get back into the house without some help, and she was exhausted when she made it back in. She's been sleeping ever since. On her back. On the couch. She came and sat in front of the couch and gave me this look like, "Well, are you going to pick me up? I'm getting up there whether you help me or not." I can see where this is going.

I've learned a lot in 16 hours. 

Dogs experience pain like people do, but they like to hide it from their people. Dogs are tough. 

Even a small step can feel big. It's all about perspective, isn't it?

Sometimes sleep really is all you need. And sometimes even that isn't enough.

I've gotten out of my writing rhythm. I find myself making stupid spelling errors, making poor word choices, and writing like a middle schooler more and more. I have always kept a journal, but I've also always had an off/on relationship with my journal (as is evidenced by the spread of dates in this journal). But I have missed working with that voice in me that likes to put word to paper (or screen). I tell my students that the more they write, the stronger their writing will be, but I haven't been practicing what I preach. 

Annie's back! and Spring Break begins...

The Annie-dog is laying on the dog bed here in the living room...sigh. She has a four-inch long scar on her right hip, and she currently has no ball in the ball-and-joint-socket; they shaved the top of her femur off and are planning on six weeks of immobility bringing about enough scar tissue to act as a ball for her bone. But that means trying to keep her still for six weeks. Have you met this dog? She doesn't know she's injured.

I started Spring Break today for Annie. I'm staying home with her tomorrow to keep an eye on her. The vet wants her in a crate. For Annie, though, a crate is much more stressful and likely to cause injury than any other kind of containment. If we had a doggie day care option, we'd be taking her there. But our directions for now are strictly for her to go outside to go to the bathroom and then go back in the house--nothing more. I doubt that Annie will be interested in this. 

The rest of my school starts Spring Break tomorrow at 3:00. I teach three different groups of students over the course of the day, and I like them all differently for different reasons, but I like one of the groups much less than the others. Honestly, I think my liking a class is in direct proportion to how well I think I'm teaching them, and I'm not doing as well with one group as I am doing with the two others. 

Next year, I will only be teaching beginners to English--students for whom the most basic of English is a challenge. And I will be teaching that group all day long. That will be a challenge for me, as well. My one hour of planning will certainly be full of administrivia as we get this newcomer center up and running, but the reward of working with students who are generally highly motivated is an awesome thing to anticipate. It's also easy to see progress. I think it's at least once a week when I look at my students and say, "Man, do you know how much you've learned already?" So I guess the change is partially for them and partially for me. I can't wait!

Tired. Annie...day three.

Annie had her surgery today. The doctor says she is okay. Or someone who answered the phone at the doctor's said she is okay. They said we get to pick her up at 3:00 tomorrow. I'm excited to have my Anniegirl back home, but I'm tired, too. 

I've been sad in the way that you get sad when something really stressful happens that takes a major response and then requires a lot of waiting. That seems to happen now and again in life. So I'm tired. Also not sleeping, really. 

Thank goodness we're on to Spring Break this weekend. 

Annie versus car. Car wins.

Annie, my beloved black lab mutt, got hit by a car yesterday morning at 4:45 a.m. Kevin had gotten up to let the dogs out so that we could get ready to go run a 10K in Louisville, and one of my neighbors happened to be driving up the road at the same time. Saturday morning. 4:45 a.m. No one is on our road. BUT, yesterday morning was not Annie's best day. 

I heard it happen, too. I was laying in bed trying to talk myself into getting up and pulling on my running tights, and I heard a thwump. I sat straight up in bed and looked out the window, but I didn't see a car, and I didn't see the dogs, and I happened to hear our cat walking around the house at the same moment, so I thought, "Ahhh, it was just the cat jumping down to the floor." 

I pulled myself out of bed and walked down the hall to the bathroom, and I was standing there looking in the mirror when I heard Kevin say, "Honey, Annie's hurt."

I went out to the kitchen to find Annie laying on the floor panting. Her right rear leg looked like it wasn't in the right place. She seemed to have no blood, no ripped fur, no... well, nothing. But she was clearly in pain and uncomfortable. So we started calling vets. 

I'll spare all the details, but it was a LONG ride to the vet. When Annie sat up in the front seat, though, Kevin and I were both relieved. We had to carry her in to the vet wrapped in our U of M/Kentucky blanket, and then we had to leave her there. That was miserable. Annie was laying on the floor, looking up at me, wondering what the heck was going on. The vet was incredibly kind, and he clearly understood that taking care of the people is almost as important as taking care of the pets. 

So several hours, and several phone calls, and one hour-long trip around Walmart trying to pass the time later, we found out that Annie will be staying at the vet's through Tuesday--surgery on Monday. Her right rear leg was dislocated from her hip, and they couldn't get it to stay in. They had to anesthetize her to give it a whirl, and she wasn't waking up well from the anesthesia. And in order to get the leg to stay in place, they have to saw off part of her femur and allow the scar tissue that will form to serve as padding between the bones of her hip and leg. Sounds painful. The doctor says it will be eight weeks of recovery for her (and us).

SOoo, now we're driving to Michigan this weekend with Annie along for the ride. But first, we're keeping our fingers crossed that the surgery goes well tomorrow.